post-purim depression
phewie! this week has been quite the kadoozie.
what's a kadoozie?
NO! itsakadoozie.
get it? (that was just an excerpt from an early 90s commercial for "Itsakadoozie", which were large, foot-long, twisted popsicles (...or, as Courney Shane ala Jawbreaker would call it: Big Stick) with green, orange, and red stripes. i will admit that i did have my father buy them for our freezer, and i will admit, too, that i was never able to finish the entire box. that was always my deal, you know; telling my dad to buy cereals, chips, ice cream, etc. that i wanted to eat, but i never finished them. yay!)
anywhore, my midterm on wednesday for physics was gang raped by me and my friends as i pummelled the shit out of it. there were no donkey punches or danza slaps (things that i would've preferred), but--alas--i will not be ungrateful! speaking of donkey punches and danza slaps...and strawberry shortcakes and many other ways to disrespect women in the sack...i remember telling these terms at the camp fire while on Harvest, and i really offended our Harvest leader. leave it to Tactless Joe to get the good times goin'!
thursday night was effing wildness...i can't go into too much detail. but i caught an episode of "PoweR Girls", went over to the 12-pack to do my duties (a few notes: A) Don't ask me to help you buy a camera when i am drunk, and get angry when i am unable to answer questions on european addresses B) When you do one line of mint snuff in a nostril, you must have a second line ready for your other nostril-- or it will get jealous C) if i roll a j, i prefer to have some, too, since--you know--i'm kinda the one that rolled it. D) dead mothers--not funny. other than that, 12 pack did exceedingly well for a thursday night--i was suprised that many people showed up to celebrate your birthday, loser. and, suprise suprise, SAE late nite was also a fucking shit show...that included me, not only getting stepped on, but getting poured on, dripped on, among other things. o college! it just wouldn't be the same if i didn't come back home smelling like the Flower Lady! afterwards, i made a gourmet run with some buds, talked about skiing and tokyo, then loafed at home watching: "The Most XXX-Treme" on Animal Planet before going to bed.
friday night was not as much effing wildness, as i had to do a lot more walking. (Happy Greek Independence Day and Happy B-day to Mr. X-tos!) hrm...around 9:30, i made my way down to give a few hellos, smoke a cig, have some champagne and eat some delicious choco cake with nilla icing. dropped by BR Entryway N to say happy b-day to my peeps, Jojo and tuckster. went back to the room to have some paris hilton cocktails (aka Sugar Free Red Bull y Viking Fjord Vodka--the kitsch-est vodka ever!). after getting lost in Silliman, i went with a bunch of peeps including the girls to SY entryway O, where i felt visually molested by too many, scary drama people. needless to say, we left in a heartbeat. bonks and i made our way to the persian party, where i was ditched my british meena (biatch!)...not to mention the fact that the bar was already closed...and over to SAE, which was quite hopping. i had to go back to Silliman, however, to re-check out Prom 2005--where i must give a big shout out to Lars Young, for being the greatest corsage-ist ever! just wait until you start covering them in swarofsky crystals! then you'll be making the real dough! but, as all things end, we all ended up going back to SAE, which was amazingly crowded and doing well for a "Mexican Themed" party. i mean, SAE isn't supposed to be that cool...and it was the second night in a row that people were packing the place. o dingy frat houses-- what more can i say? of course, i made a gor heave run before heading back home to watch Jawbreaker with all the loser sluts still left over in my room...
...and that brings me to today. i've got some diff eq to do, but i must must MUST take a shower first...as that will allow me to procrastinate even more. yay! peace out, bitches.
what's a kadoozie?
NO! itsakadoozie.
get it? (that was just an excerpt from an early 90s commercial for "Itsakadoozie", which were large, foot-long, twisted popsicles (...or, as Courney Shane ala Jawbreaker would call it: Big Stick) with green, orange, and red stripes. i will admit that i did have my father buy them for our freezer, and i will admit, too, that i was never able to finish the entire box. that was always my deal, you know; telling my dad to buy cereals, chips, ice cream, etc. that i wanted to eat, but i never finished them. yay!)
anywhore, my midterm on wednesday for physics was gang raped by me and my friends as i pummelled the shit out of it. there were no donkey punches or danza slaps (things that i would've preferred), but--alas--i will not be ungrateful! speaking of donkey punches and danza slaps...and strawberry shortcakes and many other ways to disrespect women in the sack...i remember telling these terms at the camp fire while on Harvest, and i really offended our Harvest leader. leave it to Tactless Joe to get the good times goin'!
thursday night was effing wildness...i can't go into too much detail. but i caught an episode of "PoweR Girls", went over to the 12-pack to do my duties (a few notes: A) Don't ask me to help you buy a camera when i am drunk, and get angry when i am unable to answer questions on european addresses B) When you do one line of mint snuff in a nostril, you must have a second line ready for your other nostril-- or it will get jealous C) if i roll a j, i prefer to have some, too, since--you know--i'm kinda the one that rolled it. D) dead mothers--not funny. other than that, 12 pack did exceedingly well for a thursday night--i was suprised that many people showed up to celebrate your birthday, loser. and, suprise suprise, SAE late nite was also a fucking shit show...that included me, not only getting stepped on, but getting poured on, dripped on, among other things. o college! it just wouldn't be the same if i didn't come back home smelling like the Flower Lady! afterwards, i made a gourmet run with some buds, talked about skiing and tokyo, then loafed at home watching: "The Most XXX-Treme" on Animal Planet before going to bed.
friday night was not as much effing wildness, as i had to do a lot more walking. (Happy Greek Independence Day and Happy B-day to Mr. X-tos!) hrm...around 9:30, i made my way down to give a few hellos, smoke a cig, have some champagne and eat some delicious choco cake with nilla icing. dropped by BR Entryway N to say happy b-day to my peeps, Jojo and tuckster. went back to the room to have some paris hilton cocktails (aka Sugar Free Red Bull y Viking Fjord Vodka--the kitsch-est vodka ever!). after getting lost in Silliman, i went with a bunch of peeps including the girls to SY entryway O, where i felt visually molested by too many, scary drama people. needless to say, we left in a heartbeat. bonks and i made our way to the persian party, where i was ditched my british meena (biatch!)...not to mention the fact that the bar was already closed...and over to SAE, which was quite hopping. i had to go back to Silliman, however, to re-check out Prom 2005--where i must give a big shout out to Lars Young, for being the greatest corsage-ist ever! just wait until you start covering them in swarofsky crystals! then you'll be making the real dough! but, as all things end, we all ended up going back to SAE, which was amazingly crowded and doing well for a "Mexican Themed" party. i mean, SAE isn't supposed to be that cool...and it was the second night in a row that people were packing the place. o dingy frat houses-- what more can i say? of course, i made a gor heave run before heading back home to watch Jawbreaker with all the loser sluts still left over in my room...
...and that brings me to today. i've got some diff eq to do, but i must must MUST take a shower first...as that will allow me to procrastinate even more. yay! peace out, bitches.
posted by Joe @ 10:43 AM
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